Kathryn Fox-Rogers
Chief Operating Officer
Johnnie Johnson Housing
Personal Stories – Experiencing Anxiety
This week is Mental Health Awareness Week so I felt it was an appropriate time to share my journey with anxiety for the past twenty-seven years.
Why so specific on the number of years? That’s because it’s been twenty-seven years since my lovely Mum was diagnosed with Non-Hodkins Lymphoma, which is a type of cancer.
All those years ago, I was a young twenty-one year old adult, frightened of losing her Mum and didn’t really know what anxiety was and how it can manifest in you, when dealing with a health issue within your own family network.
I want to say – my Mum is still a cancer survivor and is one of the strongest women I know.
As my Mum went through her treatment, I went on my personal journey as her daughter. In my twenties I didn’t deal with this very well. In hindsight, I wasn’t completely supportive, and I was actually quite selfish in my thoughts of how her illness was affecting me; the constant check up’s and scans – anxiety would consume me and really affect my mental health in those years.
As the years went on and I had a family of my own I started to adapt the way I felt and began introducing coping mechanisms into my own life, because I couldn’t control my Mums health, but I could control my response to it.
My lovely, warrior, Mum has endured a total of fourteen different tumour operations, as well as a hip replacement due to the cancer destroying her bones. In addition, she has lost her hair several occasions and has been lucky enough to have three clinical trials through The Christie Hospital, for which we will be forever grateful for – even if when we go for the check up’s her clinical files come on a trolley – which always makes us chuckle.
As each year went on and different relapses happened, I decided we should do things together and to make memories. We went to see a West End Show, we had different nail polish painted on our fingers, and dinner at a roof top bar. The things that we did and experienced never had be grand or expensive things – sometimes it would be finding a new house plant and doing the research just to create a memory together.
Although taking positive action, I was inadvertently creating a distraction and this was my coping mechanism to keep my anxiety managed and under control. Over the years it has really helped us both. We have looked forward to these events, together. Sharing memories and experiences has been our way of coping and enjoying our time as a family.
As a human being we all can experience anxiety, and it manifests itself in many different ways; talking and sharing can only help us in gaining and keeping control in our lives.
Of course, I am proud of my Mum, and I am proud of me too, for creating our memories of wonderful times together, of which I hope there are many more in the future.
Thanks for reading and I perhaps some of my experiences resonate with you as well.
Let’s keep talking about our own experiences of different mental health issues and our coping strategies because it is a journey that we all need to navigate.
Kathryn
Useful links
Mental Health Foundation | Good mental health for all
Contact Us | Samaritans
In the workplace | Samaritans
Samaritans Training and Engagement Programmes for Workplaces | Samaritans
Home – Mind
First Aid Training | MI Team Training | England
Mental Health Foundation | Good mental health for all
Papyrus UK Suicide Prevention | Prevention of Young Suicide (papyrus-uk.org)